Monday, October 13, 2003
There was an article in this morning's paper about the aftermath of two brother's lives after their older brother who had been diagnosed as mentally ill shot and killed their father. It depressed me all day. It made me wonder if I was being weak and putting my family at risk with Kyle, especially my husband. When Kyle dared to smoke basically in front of me that was all I could take. I gave him the article in the car and he refused to read it. I said he couldn't stay because he was putting our family at risk. He was going to get out of the car in the middle of a busy intersection. I made it through the intersection and dropped him off by work. He became manic and refused to go in. He then slammed the door and stuck his middle finger at me.
I drove home and called Jon. I called my friend who has a bipolar mom. She said I should go the hospital. One hospital said they couldn't take him because they didn't have any beds. Then I got ahold of one that said they would take him but he would need to commit himself. She said that it would be hard but I would need to call the police. Jon said Kyle would need to come home first. Jon was going to drive past our old house which Kyle broke into lately. I am so worried about Jon's safety. And so here I wait and wait and wait.